211

the scale will not budge
211 it says
even though the calories are counted
the steps are tracked
the lifestyle is healthy
211, it is still there,
mocking me, laughing at me
reminding it’s not weight at all
but the sad memories
weighing heavily on me
the trauma climbing onto my back
and adding pounds that are mine to carry
211, the seconds that pass before I think of it again?
211, the number of minutes before he climbed off me and it was over?
211, the times I have cried about it
211, the nightmares I’ve had of his evil eyes?
just bring me to a beach
with crashing waves and sun kissed skin
make me light as air
so i can float through life
carefree and full of glee
I laugh and dream of trees
I weigh nothing
the scale moves down toward freedom
I have lost the weight of my past